A Single Mistake
by Anon Y. Mous Shy
Summary: Kirai just wanted to make everyone happy. And to remember why she wanted to make them all happy in the first place. She wanted to remember before the camp. Before they went back to Amestris. Before the blue fire. Set towards the end of the Ishbalen War, then follows canon. No pairings as of yet. Rated T to be safe. ON HOLD!
1. Chapter 1

"Why do you hesitate?" asked one of the men standing above me. I was curled in a pathetic ball at their feet. Although the war was winding down, they still wanted to kill us on the other side of the wall. The man who was hesitating stood above me. I didn't mind, I particularly enjoyed living, even if I lived in a hell. The man let out an almost a pathetic sigh. He didn't want to kill me. He wouldn't kill me.

"Very well Armstrong, you're being dishonorable discharged in the morning, Mustang, finish her." Said the first man who'd spoken. I peeked out from my crumpled arms. The new man, Mustang I believe he was referred to as, met my eyes. He seemed confused. I had never seen my own eyes; I knew my hair was red, like the blood on the white haired people's clothes. I just assumed it was that color from all of the blood that seemed to soak my long shirt that barely stayed on me. What was so strange about me that he, like, what was his name… Armstrong, hesitated? Mustang snapped his fingers, a wave of fire headed towards me. I raised my hands in defense. I saw blue fire, like some wild beast, eat Mustangs flames before evaporating. Now I was confused. I knew the fire would melt bullets that headed my way, but eat other flames? And in the shape of some animal? I sat up and blinked owlishly at Mustang and the other men. They looked at me with a mixture of fear, confusion, and curiosity. The man who I believed was Mustang, I still wasn't sure if that was his name, stepped forward.

"What's your name kid?" I hadn't thought about that, I couldn't remember anything but running, blood, and God damned explosions, but my name? Something inside of me constricted as I tried to think, my brow furrowed with thought. Then it came to me.

"Kirai. Kirai Seitkastu." It sounded right on my tongue, familiar, something that meant who I was. Mustang smiled.

"Come with me." He said and held out his hand. I frowned. I liked this old, half burned house that reeked of death that I called home.

"Why?" I asked. Now Mustang frowned. I liked this game. Asking questions and answering. It was fun.

"You want to live don't you?" I did. I really did. But I going with him would involve killing, blood and tears; I didn't like any of those. I bit my lip, a bad habit from… where did I get that habit from? Why can't I remember…?

"Is there a catch?" I asked. My mind wasn't up to speed with the rest of me.

"You work for us, become a state alchemist, come back to Amestris, and live there." Said the man who had told Armstrong to go away. I was still confused.

"What's al, alchem, alchemy?" I had never heard of it, it sounded foreign coming from me. My fire wasn't alchemy, it was like a protector, and it kept me safe without me asking it to. Alchemy sounded like thinking, work and complicated science.

"It's the science of deconstructing and reconstructing matter. Mustang is a flame alchemist like you." Said, you know what, he will be Amestrian #8, because I like the number 8 and he's from Amestris.

"I'm not a flame alchemist; my fire comes and goes as it pleases. I don't think it would like being deconstructed or reconstructed." I said, although I had no better way to describe the blue flames that protected me from the hell I lived in. Mustang and Amestrian #8 frowned, I shrugged and got up.

"I guess I'll go with you, not like you'd give me a choice…" I mumbled. Mustang took my hand and led me away from the war torn streets. He took me to the big wall that separated the Amestrians and the Ishbalens as he called them. I didn't like walls, they kept people apart. We arrived at the big wall. There was no clear way to the other side. I was confused. There so many things that confuse me. Why can't I remember anything other than my name and… a smile maybe? Why do the Amestrians and Ishbalens fight? Why does Mustang make regular fire and I make blue fire? What happened next made my jaw drop. Blue electricity illuminated a section of the wall in front of us. The wall moved apart so that we could pass through. Mustang grabbed my hand snapping me out of my stupor, and pulled me through. On the other side tents, people, and a handful of vehicles covered the desert. Mustang brought me to what he called the medic tent. They checked me for wounds, there were none; I guess the blood on my shirt threw them off. They were also very interested in my eyes. What about my eyes was so damn distracting? They gave me new clothes, a black t-shirt, black boots, and jeans. Who knew they had clothes for a three year old at a military camp? After they were finished, the medics gave me water.

"Is it poisoned?" I asked.

"Now, why would we want to poison you?" asked the medic who had handed the water to me.

"You killed the people on the other side of the wall, why not me?" That quieted the medic for a minute. Mustang came back into the tent. He looked refreshed.

"Kirai, there are people I want you to meet." He said. I smiled, I liked Mustang, although he didn't openly protest, he didn't want to kill either. I walked out of the tent. Mustang was standing next to a woman with blond hair and a man dressed in a similar fashion as Mustang, an Amestrian uniform, and a dusty grey cloak. I was suddenly self-conscious. I never had reason to care for what I looked like. I just wanted to stay alive, but now that I had a chance to really live, I wanted to be accepted by others. A faint blush crossed my face when the other man looked down to me. I was afraid he might be like Amestrian #8.

"She's so adorable! I have daughter, a couple years younger than you, would you like to see a picture?" He asked. I take it back, I love this guy, and he was open and kind hearted.

"Now, Hughes, I really don't think that this is the time to-"the woman started.

"You see? I got this one just a few months ago! Isn't she adorable? Her name is Elicia. And that's my wife, Gracia. Aren't they the most wonderful! I hope to go back to them soon and-"This time, Hughes, was cut off by Mustang.

"Don't get yourself all worked up, by the way, this is Kirai, she is going to be working with the state, and then she'll be registered as a state alchemist." He said. I puffed up my cheeks childishly.

"For the last time, my fire isn't alchemy!" I said.

"Then what is it?"

"I have no idea; I don't even remember anything but the last two years and my name. How do you expect me to know how to even use the fire to help you? It protects me; I haven't a clue how to call upon it to kill!" I said irritated. The trio stared at me. I noticed the woman's interest had spiked when my fire was mentioned. I turned to her, time to change the conversation.

"Who are you?" I asked, trying not to sound rude.

"My name is Riza Hawkeye. It's a pleasure to meet you Kirai." I smiled.

"It's nice to be here instead of the other side." I answered cheerily. I met her gaze. She seemed almost startled. Again with the eyes! Wanting to escape the uncomfortable silence, I said, "The sun's going down, where the hell am I sleeping?"

"The commander said that you'd be staying with Riza." Mustang responded. "Oh, and you know what you have to do tomorrow." I frowned, I didn't want to kill. I just wanted to remember. I nodded nonetheless. Riza nodded to Mustang and motioned that I follow her. I started, but looked back at Hughes and Mustang. I was more comfortable with them, but it would be strange sharing a tent with men. I followed Riza. She seemed offset about being near me.

"Is something bothering you?" I asked as we lay down on our separate cots.

"No, why would you ask that?" she responded evenly. I shrugged.

"You seem uncomfortable with me, did I do something wrong? Is it because of my fire? Does it have something to do with my eyes?" I sent the barrage of questions at her as I propped myself up on my elbows.

"No, nothing like that, but, did you by any chance ever have a brother?" she asked. Now her question was out of the blue. I still like this question and answer game, it's still fun.

"I have no clue, maybe, I told you, I only remember the last two years, everything before that is…blank." I answered truthfully. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason." She said. I then fell into blissful sleep.

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Anon Y. Mous Shy: I was feeling inspired. I have a general idea where I want this to go, but I need a positive review to post another chapter. Oh, I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood that belongs to Hiromu Arakawa; I do own Kirai and her family. That's it, I felt motivated to write something FMAB. Again positive review if you want another chapter. If I don't get a positive review in one month, I'm taking this story down.

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Preview:

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Riza's P.O.V.

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She has to be related to him, she has almost the same eyes as him. Her hair is like his too. I can't believe I killed her older brother.


	2. Chapter 2

Riza's P.O.V.

_The boy stood tall and erect, facing the soldiers in front of him. He couldn't have been older than fifteen. He wore a dirty, blood splattered cloak the he stole from one of our fallen men. His white t-shirt and torn gray pants were fairly clean. His red hair was untamed, matted and spiked in every direction. He was my target. The boy held his hands out in front of himself, much to our soldiers' confusion. In a matter of seconds, the men were engulfed in blood red flames, reduced to ashes, not even bones were left. I was terrified. He was still my target. My hand was shaking. He turned to my direction. He had found my hiding place so easily. I met his gaze. His soft, deep violet eyes met my own chocolate brown. He seemed…sad. He smiled. Not a murdering maniac's smile. A smile, like one someone would give to their loved ones, soft and understanding. I was still scared. He closed his violet eyes and tilted his head back. I pulled the trigger. Bang! _

I awoke gasping, letting out the breath I did not know I was holding. Kirai rolled over in her sleep next to me. Her hair was the same, bloody red as his was. I was still shaking. I took a deep breath. I did my job. This girl doesn't even remember if she had a brother or not. It doesn't mean their related. I sat up and stretched. Only a few minutes before my alarm would have gone off. Good timing. I turned off my alarm before it went off, and got dressed into my uniform. I looked at Kirai. She was still asleep. I placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Time to wake up, Kirai." I said. Her eyes fluttered open. They weren't the same deep violet his eyes were. They were a clear, almost crystal like amethyst. Still there was the possibility, that she was related to him. She didn't remember.

"Good morning Riza. Is Mr. Mustang there?" she said as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. I smiled. She was so innocent, quiet, and carefree as she stretched and yawned.

"Yes, he should be awake by now. You'll see him soon." I responded. Now she smiled. That smile, just barely a smile. It was exactly like his. I froze up. She had to be related to him. She had his smile, his hair. Her eyes were almost exactly like his. I killed her brother.

"Riza? Is something wrong? Riza?" she asked, snapping me out of my thoughts. I smiled.

"I'm fine, you just reminded me of someone, someone from a long time ago." She frowned.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"Riza, is Kirai ready yet? The commander wants to see her." Called Roy, interrupting Kirai.

"Just a minute." She said. She pulled on her boots and skipped out of the tent. She was so happy. I also exited the tent. Roy was standing next to Maes and Kimblee. I didn't like him. Kirai didn't seem to like him either.

"You like killing too much." She said. For a toddler, she could read people pretty easily. Kimblee shrugged.

"I like my line of work." He turned to me, "Nice to see you Hawkeye."

"And the same to you, Kimblee." A moment of awkward silence enveloped us.

"Well, I'm here to see what Miss. Seitkastu can do. Shall we go?" Kimblee asked. Kirai cowered behind Maes.

"Do I have to?" she asked him, it was more of a squeak.

"Yes, I'm sorry squirt." Maes said. She frowned.

"But why?" she squeaked again, she must have been scared. "I don't like him, can I have someone else? Please?"

"Nope! You're stuck with me, let's go. Mustang, come with me. Maes, Riza have a good day!" Kimblee said happily. Mustang took Kirai's hand.

"It's going to be fine. You'll do great." He said a fake smile on his face. We all were uncomfortable with Kimblee. Kirai nodded and looked at Maes and me.

"See you guys later, I think…" She said before following Mustang and Kimblee towards the wall. Poor kid.

Kirai's P.O.V.

I didn't like this. More specifically, I didn't like Kimblee. He and Mustang led me to the wall. Again, it was illuminated with blue electricity as the wall moved apart to let us through. I stood in front of the war zone. The few Ishbalens who were waiting at the wall ran at the sight of Kimblee. He must be as bad as I thought. He clapped me on the shoulder, causing me to jump.

"They're all yours." He said smiling. He wanted me to kill. He took a step back, and leaned against the newly closed wall. Mustang nodded. I mentally sighed. No getting out of this one. I looked at the people in front of me. One of them aimed a gun at me. I held up my hands. The fire stopped the bullet. Now to will it towards the man. It took some concentration, but it finally took the shape of a beast, like the one that ate Mustang's flames and ran to the man. The man stood frozen as the beast opened its blue maw and pounced on him. He stood for a moment, screaming and writhing in agony before being reduced to ash. I killed someone. I wasn't overjoyed. I wasn't about to break down and cry either. I felt…hollow, like something inside me died. I stared at my hands. I was a weapon. This is what it means to live? I looked up from my hands to see Kimblee gaping. Was it impossible to make blue fire as a flame alchemist? That would confirm that my fire wasn't alchemy. It wasn't a killer. It protected me. Mustang broke the silence.

"That was the fire I was telling you about." He said. Kimblee closed his mouth and smiled. His smile scared me.

"I like it. She can stay. The war won't last much longer. So she won't be too mentally scarred." He chuckled. I hate him.

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That night I couldn't sleep. That day I had killed eighteen people. A few weeks had passed. I had killed 149 people. I was sick of all the killing. Riza still didn't seem to be comfortable with me. I still killed. All of these thoughts confused me as I stood there watching the last of the days kill burn. I was about to turn around. I heard a gunshot. I looked around. My shirt felt suddenly sticky and warm. I looked down. A bullet had gone through the center of my chest, right below my ribs. It didn't hurt. It was just a continuing numbness that spread through my body. So that was my blind spot.

"Kirai!" Someone yelled. I think it was Hughes. My knees crumpled beneath me. It was hard to breath. A few gunshots were exchanged. I hit the ground. My eyes were slowly closing. Someone knelt beside me and picked me up. It was Hughes.

"H-Hughes…" I gurgled as blood filled my mouth.

"It's going to be fine, don't talk." I closed my eyes and allowed the darkness to consume me. I'm not ready to die…

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Anon Y. Mous Shy: A special shout out to Ercy Heartlet for reviewing! Also, thank you Rex the Wolf for following. I still need more positive reviews! Sorry for the cliffy, I was feeling like writing one. Thanks! POSITIVE reviews and constructive criticism, or I take this fanfic down in one month! Oh, I wish I did , but, I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, that belongs to Arakawa.


	3. Chapter 3

_I was floating in an infinite darkness. Then, a scene of a child in a wooden room broke through the darkness. The girl sat there, her red hair was cut short and her amethyst eyes jumped from the ceiling to the floor. Footsteps echoed through the halls._

_"__Bwother!" she exclaimed. I was really confused. I should be dead. Is this what it's like to die? Was this perhaps a memory, a memory from when I was younger? The girl got up from her crouched position and half stumbled half walked to the doorway. An older boy rounded the corner, his gray cloak covered in blood stains. I couldn't see his face, as she ran up and hugged his legs. _

_"__Yuki, what's ta mattah?" She obviously was younger than me. The older boy looked down; his facial features were hidden by a hood like the ones on the Amestrian uniforms. He placed a hand over the girls face._

_"__I'm sorry." He whispered. I saw a faint smile cross his face. "Goodbye." Then a bright flash of light filled the scene and I was left in infinite darkness again._

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I woke up in the medic's tent. In contrast to the numbness I had felt when I was shot, everything hurt. I tried to sit up, only to be pushed down by a firm hand. I looked up and blinked at Mustang.

"You're in pretty bad shape. Riza didn't think you were going to make it." He said. I lay back down.

"It couldn't have been _that _bad. I mean, it wasn't right? She was just overreacting-"

"Your heart stopped, twice." He said monotonously. I blinked.

"So, I died, but I didn't die."

"Just because your heart stopped doesn't mean you died. They said your brain was still active the whole time." I cocked my head to the side I really don't understand on medical or scientific terms, but to me, I had almost died. I was scared.

"Mustang…"

"Call me Roy."

"Roy, do I still have to kill when I get better?" I squeaked. He smiled.

"No, by the time you get better, with therapy and all, we'll be heading back to Amestris. By the way, Maes volunteered to…adopt you."

"Who's Maes?"

"Oh, Hughes, but you'll be calling him dad now." I did like Hughes, but he would never be my dad. I sighed. The next few months would be not as bad, but just as painful as the last hell I lived in.

I was right. Between therapy, exercises, and a minor infection, my life was painful for those next few months. But I was finally going to see a world other than sand, blood, and soldiers. Maes, er, 'dad' as he wished me to call him, picked me up in a military vehicle. I sat in the back seat. My midsection hurt every time we hit a bump. 'Dad' went on and on about how amazing the city was and how being a state alchemist wouldn't be that bad.

"-and you won't have to kill." That made me perk up.

"No killing?" I said.

"No, the _Führer _said that you would only have to, uh, dispose of the bodies from crime scenes if the family doesn't claim them." I smiled, no killing.

"Okay… Dad." Maes flinched. I knew he hadn't seen his daughter, er, my sister yet, so being called a father must be new for him. My new life would be fun. On the train, I stared out the window in awe. I had never seen so much green in my life. Trees, grass, even farm animals were new to me. Dad would tell me about each one and what they could do. He once pointed out horses. I loved them, they were more graceful than the black and white cows that ate grass and were butchered for meat. They ran with such untamed power that I laughed when the white one reared, throwing it's rider off. My laugh startled Dad who had never seen me laugh. The horse then proceeded to run up to the fence and race the train. It lost when the fence came in front of it. I frowned as the other riders came up and took a hold of its reins and led it back to the very angry rider. I felt like that. If I ran free, I would be happy. But I couldn't live without a family to take care of me. I had to make it work. To be chained to the life of a state alchemist, be a dog of the military, but to be safe, and protected by a family. I had to be happy with that. I looked to Dad who was slowly drifting into sleep. I would be happy with my new family. In the morning, when the train had arrived in Amestris, Dad took me to see my new family. He took me to a small apartment where I would now be living. He knocked on the door of the apartment. A tall woman with honey brown hair opened the door and hugged Dad, her eyes brimming with tears.

"I didn't think you would come back." She choked out.

"Neither did me." Dad said. I watched them exchange a kiss before tugging on his pant leg to remind him I was there.

"Ah! This is Kirai, Kirai this is your new Mom." I looked up at her with a bored expression on my face. She smiled down at me and crouched to my level.

"Nice to meet you Kirai, your eyes are very pretty, would you like to meet your little sister?" She asked, I shrugged. I was feeling shy again. Mrs. Hugh- Mom, grabbed my hand and gently led me into the cozy apartment. It was small and warm and quiet. I liked it. Quiet, except for the giggle of something. I had never seen a baby before, it was strange. It looked, squishy and delicate.

"Her name is Elicia, I'm sure Maes has told you that." Mom said. I smiled at Elicia, she blinked up at me with her green eyes and laughed. I liked being a big sister. That night, at the supper table, I was introduced to milk. I loved that stuff. It was ten times better than water. The foods I ate were amazing too. Then, Mom showed me my room. It was a plain, white walled room with a dresser by the door, Mom told me we'd go shopping for clothes in the morning, a bed against the far wall, and a desk against the right wall. I liked it, although the bed would get very little use, it was luxury to someone who never had a need for a mattress. The next morning, we, as Mom had promised, went shopping.

"You can have anything you want." She told me as we parked the car on the side of the crowded streets. Anything I want… I pointed to the construction store. She looked at me funny but nodded.

"Okay then." She said. Once inside the shop, I rushed to the paint section. I picked out as many colors as I thought I would need, a bunch of paint brushes, and a single sketch pad. Mom shrugged and paid for the supplies I had picked out. "Whatever makes you happy, but now, we need to but you new clothes," she said as we finished fitting all of the art supplies into the car. We drove to a clothing store. I didn't like trying on the dresses and skirts Mom made me wear. Finally, she gave me a pair of jeans and a white tang top and a black hoodie. I loved them. Mom realized and bought me plenty of changes in varying colors. I was so excited. Next, we went to the book store. I knew how to read simple sentences but I wanted to read more than that. So, I picked out a dictionary and books on nature and society. On my way to bring them to Mom, I caught my reflection in the store window. My eyes were purple. So that was why people liked my eyes. After paying for the books, we went home after several visits to other stores. I helped Mom bring all of the paint cans, books, and clothes into our apartment.

"What are you going to do with all of that paint?" she asked. I turned around and smiled at her.

"I want to see how many colors there are other than white in my room."

That night at supper, Mom told Dad about the paint and how I refused to wear dresses or skirts. He just laughed and told Mom I just wanted to be different. I did want to be different. I wanted to explore my limits. I was happy. I was happy, but I still couldn't sleep without the faces of the people I killed pleading for help, for me to save them. That's what the sketch pad was for. So I bought it to get them out of my head, and maybe help me figure out who the boy in my dream was. The paint I would use to make my plain walls colorful. I started to read one of the nature books after dinner. It was full of wonderful animals, but my favorite was the wolf. It needed its pack to survive, but it could be free. I decided to spend my nights painting the walls of my room, and my free time during the day I spent drawing my memories.

The next day I locked myself in my room with the paint. I had read about painting in the book store the other day. First I needed a base coat and I would work my way up from there. Mom wanted me to eat lunch so I came out for that and went back to my room. This continued throughout the day.

"What are you doing in your room Kirai? Why can't we see?" asked Dad at supper. I scowled at him.

"It's a surprise, surprises are supposed to be kept hidden." I huffed. He threw his hands up.

"Sorry! But I can't have you making a mess in there."

"It's not a mess, it's a picture." Mom and Dad shrugged. I hope they're a little stricter with Elicia.

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During the night, by the light of a lamp, I finished my paintings over the next few months.

"Mom! Dad! I want you to see something!" I called as I finish putting away the last few paint brushes.

"What is it?" they chorused. I opened the door of my room and let them see it. On the wall to the far right, I painted a herd of horses running across the fields like I had seen them on the train. On the far left wall, I had painted deer grazing in a small forest clearing. The wall were the door was I had painted two trees with their branches intertwining above the door. In the trees, I had painted squirrels, robins in their nests, and a lynx at the base of both trees. But what they seemed to like the most was the painting above my bed. I had painted a mountain overlooking a snow covered forest. And on a ledge of that mountain, was a pack of wolves. There were two wolves with honey brown fur, one pup, and one Mother, both had hazel green eyes. There was a black wolf beside them, that wolf had hazel green eyes as well. There was another black wolf, it had black eyes. Then, there was a gold colored wolf with chocolate brown eyes. There was a red wolf as well, it was standing closest to the ledge, howling into the wind. It had purple eyes.

"Wow…" Dad started. "Who knew my daughter was such a great artist!" he exclaimed hugging me.

"Can't breathe." I squeak as he released me from his bear hug.

"You did all this yourself?" Mom asked in disbelief.

"Yep! Did I do a good job?" I asked. Mom smiled down at me.

"This is amazing sweetie. You're amazing." She said. I smiled. I liked this family.

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Anon Y. Mous Shy: I'm thankful that someone followed my story just please give me a single frigging review! This is the equivalent of a filler episode and there _might _be canon interaction in the next chapter so stay tuned.

Preview:

"Who the hell's the squirt?"


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